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I Am Sparcatus

This morning, after brushing my teeth with the brand new toothbrush I bought last night (medium bristles!), I decided to take my dog out for a walk. She's no ordinary dog, of course, but a pure bred basset hound which cost me $200 --- and that was as a tiny puppy! Now she's probably 10 times that size, quite an investment I'd say! I'll weigh her tonight and post the results. You never know who you'll run into on the street so I decided to 'suit up'.

I don my leather jacket and buttless leather chaps (in case I run into that pretty boy next door), put on my earrings, and just a little makeup -- not much, I prefer a natural look. I just use some base and a little rouge to highlight my cheekbones. Not my mother's brand, oh NO, it's the same stuff the professional news anchors use ( at least that's what the sales lady told me).

Well, anyway, we probably walked a mile! Along the way we passed 3 squirrels and a rabbit. I had to cut our walk a little short today because Judge Judy was coming on and I can't follow it if I miss the beginning. After Judy comes Rikki Lake and then a couple movies I rented (Dude, where's my car, and the Klumps). I've got kind of a full plate today, but somehow I need to work in some time to read the newspaper comics --- I never miss THOSE, they crack up me! How do they come up with that stuff?!

Later tonight it's a trip to the bar for some pool with the local hillbillies and off to the movie theatre. I know you are all probably falling asleep, so I must be falling in love --- no, wait....reverse that!

Anyway, I'll keep you guys posted when I decide what I'm having for dinner.

seeya in the funny papers, you synchrophantic faggots!!

Iamadorkicus
(shutup eom)


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