The Anti Oppression Federation

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The Election Of This Year: My Perspective

I didn't want George Bush to win because he was already president once and I saw a commercial that said if he was elected he would kill my grandma. My dad voted for him. Bush is a Republican, and my dad says he always votes for Republicans because he wants to keep the negroes out. He also says that if Gore gets in office the country will be overrun by gays. I asked him what "gays" were and he just started talking about something else. I asked my teacher at school what it meant and she said it means "happy," but then she sort of walked away before I could ask her what that had to do with Al Gore. I was happy yesterday because I ate a corndog and I wanted to tell my dad so I went in where he was watching football with a bunch of his friends and told him I was gay. Now he says I can't have corn dogs any more.

Nobody knows who the president is because they had the election in Florida since it was Florida's turn to pick the president because their state is shaped like a big wiener. And when they counted the votes there were problems because their vote-counting robot was broken. Then they had to go through and count the votes by hand, and it turned out that the same number of people voted for both guys, only it turns out that Bush may have cheated because he would have voters come in, vote, then leave and come back wearing different clothes and a fake mustache so they could vote again. Sometimes my dad does that at work when they hand out the paychecks. He gets his then gets back in line wearing a different shirt and glasses and when he gets up to the counter he's like "Uh, I haven't gotten my check yet" and then they give him another one.

He used the extra money one time to buy me a horse, and I used to ride it to school every day but one day it kicked my sister in the head and her brain stopped working and we had to kill the horse and eat it. Ever since then my sister has started wearing a lot of makeup and she takes showers all the time and gets mad when I go in her room. I asked my other Mom if we could have her taken away and put into one of those homes for crazy people and she said no. I can fit a whole orange in my mouth.

Also, I think Tommy in gym class is cute (don’t tell)

Bibliography:

It Didn't Smell Like That When I Ate It: My life in American politics by Lincoln, Abraham. 1864

Democracy is a Whore by Thatcher, Margaret. 1994

A Pimp Times Five: an autobiography by Dole, Bob. 1998

From Aurthur Aarden on: A complete list of the men who never ran for president, Vol. 1 by Hinsdale, Martin. 1999.

United Stank of America: 300 years of racial injustice by Jackson, Jesse. 1984

Harry Potter and His Magic Pot of Hair by Rowling, J.K. 1997

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